𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞 - 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐲

As we age, one of the most freeing realizations we can have is this: 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒅𝒖𝒍𝒕 𝒓𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒗𝒐𝒍𝒖𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒚. When we’re kids, we’re stuck with whoever’s around—family, classmates, the neighbour who insists on cuddling you when you don’t want.. But as grown-ups? We get to choose. There’s something really freeing about that.

Think about it—no one is forcing us to stay in friendships, partnerships, or even family dynamics that don’t serve us.

When we truly embrace this idea, something shifts. We start to see our connections through a new lens. We stop chasing people who don’t value our time or energy, and instead, we pour into those who genuinely want to be in our lives. Suddenly, it’s not about clinging to people out of guilt or obligation—it’s about celebrating the ones who actually want to be in your orbit We are not about being cold or dismissive—it’s about understanding that our time and emotional energy are precious. Why waste them on people who don’t appreciate us?

Imagine you're at a gathering. You're chatting with someone, (because you have to) but the conversation feels forced. You're trying to find common ground, but it's like searching for a signal in a dead zone. You could keep pushing, trying to make it work, or you could… gracefully excuse yourself and find someone whose energy matches yours.

𝑵𝒐𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒚 𝒊𝒏 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒔 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓, and that’s okay. Some relationships are seasonal, and that’s natural. What matters is how we handle it. When someone shows us—through their actions or words—that they’re not interested in being part of our journey, we can gracefully step back. Gracefully stepping back isn’t about being cold—it’s about honouring your own peace. It’s like unclenching a fist you didn’t even know you were holding. You don’t need to announce your intentions,; sometimes it’s just a quiet fade, a polite “𝑛𝑜 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑘𝑠” to the next invite. No drama, no hard feelings. Just a quiet understanding that it’s time to redirect our energy elsewhere.

On the flip side, when we find people who light us up, and who make us feel seen and valued, we hold onto them. We invest in those relationships because they’re the ones that truly matter. These are the connections that fill our cups, challenge us to grow, and remind us why life is better when shared.

When you lean into this mindset, you stop chasing approval. You don’t have to twist yourself into knots to make someone stay. Instead, you get to build a circle that’s real—full of people 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦. It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality. As an adult, you can curate the relationships you want to hold on to and that is liberating.